Behind the Cameras
by CyberSerpent
Summary: A little sidefic for my Pillow Grand Pree...Aoshi and Kenshin are just NOT cooperating so I did a little humor to ward off time. A series of Kyoto-arc bloopers! **SPOILERS**


Disclaimer- I own nothing but my own breed of rabbits that I bred called Foo-Foo Bunnies!

A/n- got a little tired of being hunted down by Saito and Usui in Pillow Grand Pree, so escaped here to rest…::pant pant:: anyhoo, here's a little collection of RK bloopers!!! What the directors DON'T want you to see! Ho ho!

Behind the Cameras Epi. 54: Hiten versus Shukuchi—take one 

Soujiro: But this time, Himura, it'll only be one step short of the Shukuchi. 

Kenshin: ::braces himself::

Soujiro: ::dashes forward, then leaps back::

Kenshin: huh?

::loooooooong pause::

Director: Soujiro-kun?

Soujiro: ::crying:: I think I sprained my ankle!

Epi. 54: Hiten versus Shukuchi—take two 

Soujiro: But this time, Himura, it'll only be one step short of the Shukuchi. 

Kenshin: ::braces himself::

Soujiro: ::dashes forward, and collides into Kenshin::

Kenshin: oooooooroooooo! ::crashes back into Sano::

Sanosuke: whoooooaaaaaaaa! ::slams into Yumi::

Yumi: eeeeeeeeeyah geroff me ya buncha pervs!!! ::tumbles into cameraman::

::all turns black, only the sound of the director screaming is heard::

Epi. 55: The Tragedy of a Stormy Night—take one 

Shishio: ::picks up onigiri and begins eating::

Soujiro(young): a-ano, Shishio-san?

Shishio: hm? ::munch munch::

Soujiro(young): s-since you were slaying policemen, are you a…bad person?

Shishio: it's the Meiji government that's really bad. They used me all they could, and then tried to cremate me alive. ::munch munch::

Soujiro(young): then you're a good person?

::looong pause::

Soujiro(young): uh, Shishio-san? Your line?

Shishio: ::garble garble choke choke::

Director: I think he's choking on the rice! Someone help him!

Soujiro(young): Sh-Shishio-san!

Epi. 55: The Tragedy of a Stormy Night—take two 

Shishio: ::picks up onigiri and begins eating, still coughing a bit::

Soujiro(young): a-ano, Shishio-san?

Shishio: hm? ::munch munch::

Soujiro(young): s-since you were slaying policemen, are you a…bad person?

Shishio: it's the Meiji government that's really bad. They used me all they could, and then tried to cremate me alive. ::munch munch::

Soujiro(young): then you're a good person?

Shishio: ::gulps down onigiri with some difficulty and turns to Soujiro:: no, I am truly evil.

Soujiro(young): ::squmeeps, and ducks to—:: ahhhhhhh!!!

Shishio: oi you okay kid?! ::runs to dig Soujiro out from the avalanche of rice barrels that befell the kid::

Epi. 55: The Tragedy of a Stormy Night—take three 

Shishio: ::leaning against doorpost:: are you…crying?

Soujiro(young): ::turns to Shishio, teary-eyed:: ::chokes out:: YES!

Shishio: baka! That wasn't what you were supposed to say!

Soujiro(young): ::sniffles:: but I am!!! I can't lie!

Director: ::slaps forehead:: oh kami-sama…

Epi. 55: The Tragedy of a Stormy Night—take four 

Sanosuke: he's coming.

Kenshin: yeah.

Sanosuke: you okay?

Kenshin: I can't say one way or another. But with the rest I got, I'll probably be okay.

Soujiro: are you ready now? This time, just one step shy of the Shukuchi… ::jumps up to the ceiling—and falls:: OWWWW! My butt!

Kenshin: ::sweatdropping:: daijobu desu ka, Soujiro-kun?

Soujiro: oweeeeee…I think I broke my gluteus maximus…owwwww…

Epi. 56: A Duel with an Extreme Moment—take one 

Soujiro: ::thinking:: but in reality…in reality…I was crying…::yelling now:: AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! ::sword falls down and he starts to 'psyche-snap', as the subtitles put it ^_^;::

Yumi: Soujiro's…doing the polka!

Director: Yumi! That wasn't what you were supposed to say!

Yumi: but he is! Epi. 56: A Duel with an Extreme Moment—take two 

Soujiro: ::thinking:: but in reality…in reality…I was crying…::yelling now:: AUGHHHHHHHHHH—OWWWWWWW!!!

Kenshin: Soujiro? 

Soujiro: ::voice is hoarse:: my throat…I think I overdid it…

Yumi: my gawd…

Epi. 56: A Duel with an Extreme Moment—take three 

Soujiro: ::thinking:: but in reality…in reality…I was crying…::yelling now:: AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! ::sword falls down and he starts to 'psyche-snap'::

Yumi: Soujiro's…lost it…

Soujiro: I know now…every time you fight with me…it's so irritating! You…Himura…you frustrate THE HELL OUTTA ME!

::a girl bursts in, screaming: "My gawd! I can't believe you cussed, Sou-Sou-chan! You disappoint me!!!::

Soujiro: ano…who are you?

Girl: I can't believe it! You cuss! Waiiiiii!!! ::runs back out, screaming::

Director: uhm…okay, let's get back t—

::Saito and Usui bust in::

Saito: have you seen a girl with a ponytail around here anywhere?!

Director: what are you doing here?! This isn't your—

Sanosuke: ::pointing to door:: she went thataway.

Usui: thanks. ::beckons at Saito:: let's go pardner!

Saito: you got it! ::pulls out sword:: that woman's gonna get it! No one cuts out _my_ fighting scene and gets away with it!

::the dynamic duo burst out again, waving their weapons and searching for the girl::

Soujiro: uh…shall we begin again?

Epi. 56: A Duel with an Extreme Moment—take four 

Aoshi: ::takes breath in ragged, short gasps, reaches for sword, pulls it out, and drops it on—:: OWWWWWWWW, MY FOOT!!!!! GODDAMN ****ING THING! 

Misao: ::shocked:: Aoshi-sama!

Saito: ::bursts in:: is it my scene yet?! I've been too busy chasing that CySer freak! Izzit my turn now?! ::looks at sword stuck in Aoshi's foot:: …ooch you're gonna feel _that_ in the morning, Aoshi.

Aoshi: ::says thru gritted teeth:: gee, ya think?!

_Epi. 56: A Duel with an Extreme Moment—take five_

Soujiro: tell…tell Shishio-sama I have found out the secret of the Amakaka—oops…

Yumi: ::bursts out laughing:: gotcha! I gotcha good! Amakaka…for sure…

Sanosuke: it means I'm a caca right? but what's a caca?

Kenshin: look it up in a Spanish dictionary, Sano, I'm sure the word will come into use later on for you.

Sanosuke: oh seriously? Cool. ::grabs a Spanish dictionary out of hyperspace:: let's see…caca…

::Kenshin, Soujiro, Yumi, and the rest of the crew slip out::

Sanosuke: ::voice is distant:: _HEY! _Caca means poop! …this could come in handy…

Epi. 57: Two Men at the End of an Era—take one 

Sanosuke: whew…this place certainly lives up to being called the Inferno Room…this horrible smell…probably burned off of stinkwater…

Yumi: yeah, I know, it's petroleum burning your jacket right now too.

Sanosuke: KYYA?! ::stares at the ever-growing flame burning up his white jacket::

Kenshin: stop drop and roll Sano!

Sanosuke: what kind of wussy do you think I am Kenshin?!  YOOOWWWWCH!

Kenshin: ::mutters:: obviously not a very smart one, de gozaru yo.

Epi. 57: Two Men at the End of an Era—take two 

Sanosuke: I may be a little crazy, but falling for that nutcase, you've proven yourself totally wacked!

Yumi: WHAT?!?! Why YOU!!! ::jumps on Sano, clawing at his face and screaming: "Take that back! Take it back!"::

Director: Yumi! Yumi! Control yourself! Security! Get her off!

Epi. 57: Two Men at the End of an Era—take three 

::Shishio is making out with Yumi::

Sanosuke: oh ick.

Director: no! that's not right you doofus!

A/n- another round of pathetic bloopers might await us next…MIGHT. If I somehow get tired of writing Pillow Grand Pree again ^_^;;; Anyhoo, remember when Sou-chan was psyche-snapping? My little sister really thought he was doing the polka! And even I, who's a major Sou-chan fan (hey that rhymes!), thought he was overdoing it when he bammer his head on the tatami two times…seriously freaked me out…. Anyhoo, when Sou-chan cussed, my sis and I actually gasped! And then when you see this screencap, it shows Soujiro like glaring at Kenshin (after his psyche-snap) and Kenshin was all freaked out, like "Oro?". I was laughing at the part ^_-;

Later dayz and keep up the reviews!!!

CyberSerpent .~

PS. Yes I am being hunted down by Saito and Usui currently—oh damn they're breaking my barred door now…gotta fly! Byez ppl!


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